Every one of us has done it — imagine your death, whether in gory detail or in a soft release. Maybe a bullet when you never expected, the snap of headshot while your squad hears the crack a split second later. When service members take the oath in whatever back room, musty-smelling recruiting station that birthed a small part of the most lethal fighting force the world has ever seen, we know death is an occupational hazard. I imagined my own death several different ways in many countries. The last one, the one that really would’ve mattered, was in a helicopter crash — my son, who was two weeks old when I left for my last deployment to Syria, would only know me through pictures and what little I wrote him during his time in the womb.
I imagined my wife, sobbing by my casket while holding my infant son and a folded flag. Or maybe she was in shock and doesn’t flinch when the 21-gun salute goes off. I don’t have to wonder anymore — I came home, alive, and thrived.
That thought exercise is valuable for several reasons. The first is a soldier’s identity is so tightly woven into the fabric of our military uniform that when we hang it up, for good, a part of us goes with it. We question who we are without it, doubt our existence, our status, and our role in the world without a rank on our chest and an unwavering mission in our hearts. A recent study found that “the hazard rate of suicide was about 2.5 times higher for veterans within the first year of separation than for the active-duty population.”
That first year out of the military is the hardest — it’s called the valley of death and it’s where veterans need the most help and guidance. Since 2001, more than 140,000 veterans have died by suicide. If you add up all service members who died in combat in the Korean War, Vietnam War, and the War on Terror combined, then multiply by two, that equals around 140,000.
Confucius said that “every man has two lives, the second begins when he realizes he has only one.” The second reason imagining your own death during your service is valuable to your second life is that you’ve already overcome it.
That thing you thought you’d never live through? You did. Every time the military ordered you to a new job, a new post, a new deployment, that was a transition, and you adapted and overcame it — you may have even excelled or found new skills or talents. I won’t downplay exiting the military, it is the scariest thing I’ve ever done, but it’s certainly not impossible.
I am a proud product of the Honor Foundation, American Corporate Partners (ACP) Veteran Mentoring Program, and ultimately TechCongress. These are three amazing programs designed to help transitioning service members become successful veterans in the civilian world and in the case of TechCongress, put technologists on the Hill.
If you’re doubting how to translate your skills or job in the military to the civilian world, know this: there a million standards, protocols, skills, and doctrinal lessons you learned in the military, but the one that really matters is the fact that the military taught you to think critically under high stress or ambiguous environments. If you know that and allow it to guide you in your decision making, you will succeed.
During a recent Veterans on Duty event, Sen. Tim Sheehy (R., Mont.) and Rep. Jake Ellzey (R., Texas) — both Navy veterans — gave remarks on how to build tomorrows military and the importance of Special Operations Forces. Senator Sheehy noted that “the war has already begun,” referencing the escalation between China and, well, everyone else in the world.
There is a task and purpose to be found in a second life. We will need every ounce of veteran critical thinking in the more dangerous world of tomorrow.
There are countless veteran programs to choose from and free to the veteran or service member — supported by amazing donors everywhere. The Department of Defense offers Skillbridge programs to work the last several months of active duty and there are myriad veteran hiring programs for each and every service member and veteran as well — just ask.
Your second life is waiting for you. You’ve already realized you only have one.
David Cook is the director for national security for open source intelligence company, ShadowDragon. He is the former Executive Director of the Special Operations Association of America, author of OSINT strategy and policy at the U.S. Army and Defense Intelligence Agency, former professional staffer for Rep. Darrell Issa, and a U.S. Army special operations veteran.